Funny Graduation Quotes

Graduation quotations bring a twinkle to students’ eyes and help in breaking the ice on serious occasions, like graduation, convocation, congratulatory day, and so on. On an occasion when students don mortarboards caps and long flown gowns, to collect their certificates of graduation; quotations and sayings play a significant role. While inspirational and success quotes help to inspire students and change their lives, funny and humorous ones make them laugh, think and dream. The highly charged and emotional situation can be lightened with these hilarious quotations. Read through the following lines to find out some funny and humorous graduationquotes.

 

Humorous Quotations For Graduates

 

A professor is someone who talks in someone else's sleep.

- W.H. Auden

 

A man who has never gone to school may steal from a freight car.

But if he has a university education, he may steal the whole railroad.

- Theodore Roosevelt

 

If you can imagine it, you can achieve it;

If you can dream it, you can become it.

- William Arthur Ward

 

I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.

- Mark Twain

 

Graduation day is tough for adults.

They go to the ceremony as parents.

They come home as contemporaries.

After twenty-two years of child-raising,

they are unemployed.

- Erma Bombeck

 

If you feel that you have both feet planted on level ground, then the university has failed you.

- Robert Goheen

 

A graduation ceremony is an event where the commencement speaker tells thousands of students dressed in identical caps and gowns that 'individuality' is the key to success.

- Robert Orben

 

If you can find a path with no obstacles, it probably doesn't lead anywhere.

- Frank A. Clark

 

Commencement speeches were invented largely in the belief that outgoing college students should never be released into the world until they have been properly sedated.

- Garry Trudeau

 

It is indeed ironic that we spend our school days yearning to graduate and our remaining days waxing nostalgic about our school days.

- Isabel Waxman

 

...Yes, the lectures are optional. Graduation is also optional.

- Bob Bickford

 

Your families are extremely proud of you. You can't imagine the sense of relief they are experiencing. This would be a most opportune time to ask for money.

- Gary Bolding

 

I have never been jealous. Not even when my dad finished fifth grade a year before I did.

- Jeff Foxworthy

 

Education is an admirable thing, but it is well to remember from time to time that nothing worth knowing can be taught.

- Oscar Wilde

 

Education is a progressive discovery of your own ignorance.

- Will Durant

 

Don’t judge each day by the harvest you reap but by the seeds that you plant.

- Robert Louis Stevenson

 

The trouble with learning from experience is that you never graduate.

- Doug Larson

 

If opportunity doesn't knock, build a door.

- Milton Berle

 

Success is the ability to go from one failure to another, with no loss of enthusiasm.

- Sir Winston Churchill

 

At commencement you wear your square-shaped mortarboards. My hope is that from time to time you will let your minds be bold, and wear sombreros.

- Paul Freund

 

To those of you who received honors, awards and distinctions, I say well done. And to the 'C' students, I say you too may one day be President of the United States.

- George W. Bush

 

Education is what survives when what has been learned has been forgotten.